Somehow we made it through the holidays. Here we are, a little battered and bruised....but we made it to 2016.
My husband's mother and her husband were able to make the trip from Oklahoma to stay with us for Christmas through New Year's. We had a nice time. Nothing big or fancy, but just enjoyed time spent together with relaxation and good conversation.
I've spent the time since, thinking about some casual comments made to me about things in our home that I brushed off at the time, but have begun to fester. Comments about the decoration of our home, the state of our linens, mismatched furniture etc.
One of the things I really enjoy is decorating a room. I love to find an object to base the room on, pic out paint colors, match and organize. Walking into a fresh clean room is like a breath of fresh air for me.
We moved into our new home about five months ago and the first thing I did was imagine how I could decorate in a way that wouldn't break the bank. We live a very frugal lifestyle so we can afford to care for our medically fragile family. Autism is not cheap, and we are grateful we know what to do to help our son overcome the difficulties he faces each day. Because of this, "things" do not have much value to me anymore. Even though I love to decorate, it is just a fraction of what I would do if I had unlimited funds....or even some allotted funds. So, all I decorated after the move was the two boys bedrooms. It was enough to get me by and the rest would have to wait.
During the holidays, I was of course, thinking about gifts. The last thing I wanted to buy for anyone in my family was useless "stuff" and it was also the last think I wanted to put on my list. I didn't want anything I had to dust and nothing that would completely lose it's value the moment purchased, like a boxes set of a TV series.
I could think of things we needed....new underwear is always a useful gift! Maybe a robe or slippers when the house gets a little cool. But in reality....nobody really NEEDED anything...and I was relieved. I felt very blessed and content.
But then the comments started.
Were they true? Yes. Most of our towels are stained mismatched and falling apart, in all three bathrooms and in the kitchen. Are the pictures on the walls small and bland....sure. Furniture mismatched....Yep.
I never let myself feel bad about these things. After all, it's just "stuff". Do we have a couch to sit on? Yeah we do. That's all that really matters to me at this point.
I need my family to be healthy. My thoughts are on vitamins, supplements and detox, not frilly wall décor. It's just not what's important.
One day we will be able to buy new linens that all match and paint the walls and take out this old carpeting, but for today.....I remain grateful that we have what we NEED.
I know what was said was not to intentionally be offensive. At first, I started feeling really insecure about my home and letting people see it. Does everyone look at all that is lacking? I for one, see the potential here and just because we can't get it all done right away, doesn't take away from it's value.
My family's health is first and foremost. And if it's not a functional item in this home, well, it just costs money, collects dust, and takes up space.
This was a good reminder, to not let anyone ruin your happiness.
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