Saturday, February 15, 2014

The Right Time

"So, I've been meaning to ask you about the sign you have on your car....uh...the bumper sticker?  It says kids with Autism can recover?  I've never heard that before...can you explain a little more?"
 
I was pretty shocked by this question.  I had that magnet on my truck for about a year and no one had ever asked me about it.  It wasn't just the question that took me off guard, but it was the genuine interest that set me back.  I was used to the eye rolling and the defensive objections, but not someone who really wanted to understand the statement.
 
Ok, Meadow, don't choke on your food!  Don't act surprised.  This is the moment you've been waiting for.  You "train" everyday for this!  You know what eloquent people sound like...you read their blogs and posts on Facebook!  Be smart.  Be confident.  Don't make things too controversial or too technical.  Just explain...but don't take an hour to do so.  Breathe and let the conversation flow.
 
So, I did.  I told her about children with autism having comorbid conditions that most doctors refused to recognize or treat. She was appalled to think a doctor would not see the child first.
 
I told her it was a book I read, not the internet or some sort of cult, that led me to a doctor who would treat Tristen for his underlying illnesses.  I told her it was extremely expensive, and I started working outside the home to cover the costs; and that I could only do so because the treatment was working- I did not have a sick child home from school regularly to take care of.
 
I told her how the doctor used lab tests to find a strep infection in his gut that was most likely the main cause of his life long fevers and rashes.  I explained how when a person with autism was treated for their illnesses, the severity of their autism would start to fade....sometimes more dramatically..... and that over time, in some cases, the child no longer fits the criteria for autism.
 
The young mother took it all in. She never shared if she knew anyone with autism or her feelings about what I had just told her.  She seemed to be mulling it over in her head.
 
I said, "Every person is an individual and what works for some doesn't work for others.  For us, I followed my gut....I followed the promptings of the Holy Ghost to go after this method of treatment for my son...I had no doubt that I was doing the right thing!  It all made so much sense and had all the answers I had been looking for!  There may be somethings I can't change....like the damage done for having high fevers for nine years....but that's ok with me too, because there IS a lot I CAN change!
 
 I believe it is my job as a mother, to do whatever I possibly can for my child to be his best.  I will spend my last dollar and lose my last friend for my child. I will feel completely alone in this world.  But it will all be worth it."
 
She didn't ask me about vaccines...and with a baby in tow....I imagine she didn't want to know the answer.  That was o.k. too...I think sometimes if we hit 'em to hard with something that controversial, they tend to put up that wall....that scared place where they don't want to listen to anything that shatters their idea of a perfect world where no one is evil or greedy.  This way, if she believes the part about treatment, she will be more open to believing the rest when the time is right :)