Having recently moved to Texas, I agonized about putting my Autistic sophomore through yet another school change. Seeing this news report this morning evoked deep emotion.
I look at the sweet-faced little boy and see, not only my son, but many similar students I have worked with over the years. I try to fathom what on Earth would possess them to use such vile tactics? I can't begin to understand the thought process that would lead to the assumption that this type of "teaching" is acceptable. I wonder how many people probably knew of the teacher's and aide's practices. How long did it go on? Did anyone try to stop them? Did they go to the principal or the school board? Were they brushed off? Or did they believe this was "what needed to be done" for "those kinds of students"?
When I read the first grader had attempted suicide...my heart was breaking.
He could speak, but he did not tell for a long time.
The teacher(s) and aides were fired but parents were never notified of the abuse. This child at least should have immediately began counseling to try to ease the pain of his afflictions and taken out of the school district all together. In his mind, he might not have realized the adults who caused terror could not come back to school and lived in constant fear.
My heart breaks for this child and all those like him.
Working for a school district, moving around, and being very involved in my children's education...I know a lot of teachers. When I shared the thought of homeschooling my kids once we moved to Texas, I sensed a weird vibe. And I get it. Teacher's can't really be PRO homeschooling. If we all did it, they wouldn't have jobs. And they can't possibly think that just ANYONE can do it, or their years of college and degrees would be meaningless. So, I understand why they would be less than enthusiastic and minimally supportive.
But when you have experienced multiple districts, schools, teachers, special ed teachers, programs, aides, students....you can easily distinguish the good from the bad....the ones that care and the ones that don't. And when you are in the special education classroom as an employee yourself, you really get to see what goes on without the parents, or community for that matter, knowledge. You see how IEP's can be "fudged". You see staff's TRUE feelings toward special needs individuals. It starts to eat you up inside.
So, I chose homeschooling this year, and wish I would have/ could have done it all along. This first week of school we are getting right to the books....we are LEARNING. There is no week-long review of the "Rules" for classroom, assemblies, lunchroom etc. They do this for all kids, to "re-teach" the ones who don't follow the rules. Teaching staff believes if children are not following the rules, it is because they failed to appropriately teach them. So they spend A LOT of time re-teaching. A time your child could be learning, and chances are your child already knows the rules.
(I find supervision and follow through are more productive if you want a child to follow rules and expectations.)
I choose homeschooling because there is no one else who knows what is best for my child but me. Many many teachers believe they know better than the parents and blame us for everything. I want to decide when my autistic son learns about birth control; or if he is ready for an overnight field trip...and that doesn't make me a bad parent if I don't feel comfortable with it at the time it is suggested by the teacher.
I choose to home school so I can prepare healthy, organic foods and snacks for my kids throughout the day without them being constantly bombarded with sugary parties and rewards. I want to teach them WHY we eat the food we eat and what it does for their bodies.
I want them to know MILK is NOT good for you, and calcium comes from and is better absorbed from other healthier sources.
I choose to home school because I want my son to have his academic schedule adapted to his ability level! I have been arguing this for YEARS with teaching staff. He is quite ABLE, but not always at grade level. He doesn't need to draw six pictures of the solar system a day because the subject material he is expected to sit through is so above him he has no clue what anyone is talking about. It is NOT acceptable to simply give him an A for attendance because they "understand" he can't do the work. They should be giving him work he "can" do so he is not bored and he is getting something out of school. Otherwise they are just baby-sitting.
I also want my son to have a real curriculum, not one that is the same every year no matter if he has mastered the skill or not.
I printed out the news story above to carry with me, so every time I get that look...."Home school? Why?" I can show it to them. This is one of the worst case scenarios, but I am not taking that chance again.
After Hyperbaric treatment last summer, Tristen's mind was being open up to past memories and he was verbally sharing more than ever. He told me he remembered his kindergarten teacher spanking him. He said, "But mom...I was just a little boy! I just wanted to go home!" It broke my heart to hear my 14 year old, who was low verbal at the time, express such pain over something that happened so many years before.
The thing was, I expected something was wrong, so I made it a point to be at that school as often as possible. I signed up for every party and field trip and showed up unexpectedly with "treats". He started throwing up every morning at school and I would have to pick him up. He was never "ill". I had a feeling in my gut something was wrong. I questioned staff. I worried he was being "touched" by someone or mistreated in some way. No one had any ideas or gave any clues to what could be wrong.
He was in the same classroom, with the same teacher and aide for first grade when the teacher broke down in tears at a conference and told me that she was a victim. She told me that most of the school staff and principal was white and they were framing her for abuse. They alleged she hit a child with a ruler, but could never prove it, even after an investigation.
Tristen new the truth all along.
I hope and pray parents become informed. We WANT to trust our children's teachers so MUCH because the thought of having to leave them with someone who isnt' safe is inconceivable. But we HAVE to do our homework and research and CHECK UP! They aren't going to put cameras in classrooms anytime soon, I'm afraid. If we ALL start to be aware, it will be harder to hide it from us and things will have to change.
My thoughts and prayers are with all our little loved ones who are embarking this fall on a new school year. May God be with you and protect you and let us know when we should be alarmed.
My thoughts and prayers are with all our little loved ones who are embarking this fall on a new school year. May God be with you and protect you and let us know when we should be alarmed.
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